Wednesday, December 10, 2008

You Know Things Are Bad When...


The Dow Jones fell again today on news that Merriam Webster Dictionary laid off 20,000 words including most of the 2008 new entries which include: air quotes (you're screwed Paris Hilton), edamame, fanboy, mental health day, mondegreen (n: a word or phrase that results from a mishearing of something said or sung and really not used by myself or anyone i know), pescatarian, subprime (sorry newscasters and Congress), Texas Hold ’em (my sympathies, Vegas) and webinar (the intertubes are shit out of luck on that one). As these words are now downsized and applying for unemployment insurance, if you use them in any conversation, you must make sure they fill out a w-9 form and compensate them accordingly.

In other news, you know things are bad when even the illegal immigrants are returning to Mexico because they can’t find work in the states. That means nobody is hiring anyone to do even the shittiest of jobs. Guess I won't even try to be a migrant worker this spring. Well, at least this solves our border problem. I wonder if Mexico is trying to keep them from returning?

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